This Year For Presidents’ Day, I’m Giving Up On Rock And Roll (Lyrics)

I was gonna die alone, I know (Gonna die before thirty years old) I've got this notion that successful careers are evil So finally for the holidays (A gift is coming all y'alls way) My family will be excited when they look under the Presidents' Day tree To see a box shrink-wrapped with real gold Not paper gold It's a fucking box filled to the top With fucking gold Hey, Mom! I got a job I'm not wasting my potential! Hey, all my friends! You don't have to hear about blah blah band Who just got a brand new Prevost bus And forgot my name and used to open for us It's getting old, I know That's why I'm giving up on rock and roll We'll celebrate in my new pad (I'm flying you out mom and dad!) I've got a new job and a 40 inch plasma (We'll watch 24!) Now without music I can concentrate on sitting down And charging by the hour to sell ideas to some assholes who wants to sell a car I've upgraded from my childhood bedroom To Southern Cali, Southern California (Everyone here's always smiling) Hey, Dad! I sold the van and used the money to invest! I'm buying stocks and climbing ladders! I'm all business! Yes sir! Right sir! Coming sir! Your documents are in order! You're fucking proud. I know Thank Bush I've given up on rock and roll Hey, Mom! I got a job I'm not wasting my potential! Hey, all my friends! You don't have to hear about blah blah band Who just got a brand new Prevost bus And forgot my name and used to open for us It's getting old, I know Thank Cheney I've given up on rock and roll We'll drink Delirium not Pabst Not at my parents' We're at my brand new apt (That stands for apartment)